I am someone who believes everything happens for a reason. I believe there is a plan for me, one that I might not always be able to see, but a plan nonetheless. On November 20, 2015 I temporarily stopped believing in that plan. I was 10 weeks pregnant and had just been told my baby did not have a heartbeat and there was nothing that could be done. Thanksgiving was 6 days away and it was when we planned on telling our families about the baby, now we were calling family members and telling them in the same conversation that we were pregnant but the baby didn’t make it. We had to tell our 2 1/2 year old that the baby was no longer in Mommy’s tummy but in heaven. Some people may question why we told him, but with him kissing my belly everyday and talking about his little brother/sister, we didn’t see another option.
The days and weeks after our loss were filled with a lot of tears and even more questions. Why did this happen? How could my body fail my child? Why would this be a part of my plan? And then a couple really great things happened. First, my husband and I started attending a support group for people that have gone through similar situations. It is not an exaggeration when I say, the first time I felt like I could breathe again after our loss, was when I walked out of that first meeting. It is a club no one wants to be a part of but once you are, it becomes like your second family.
Second, I rediscovered Mama Laughlin. She is someone I follow on Facebook who has a blog about her weight loss journey. Right after the holidays I saw a post she had on a dietbet she was hosting with a link to her AdvoCare site. I had participated in one of her dietbets before, and had won, and who wouldn’t want to get paid for losing weight?! So I talked to my husband and told him not only did I want to do the dietbet again but what if I got into AdvoCare too? Because this is what I realized, there was a plan for me and since I wasn’t privy to what that plan was, I needed (for my own sanity) to come up with my own plan. And that started with me getting healthy. I wanted to be healthy for my son, my husband, any future children we may be blessed with but mostly for me. So I signed up to do the AdvoCare 24 day challenge and guess what, I lost 15lbs and 11inches….in 24 days!!! Am I saying it is a miracle pill that you take and weight will just fall off, no of course not or everyone would be doing it. But I was determined to be successful, so I followed their food guidelines and I started jogging again, something I had not done since before the miscarriage. In a later post, I will go more into my journey with AdvoCare but my purpose for this post is to explain why I started this blog in the first place.
So even though I was on this journey to becoming healthier, I still needed more. I needed something else to come out of this tragedy and that’s when Mama Laughlin inspired me again. Her blog helped me kick start my weight loss journey, what if I started a blog to help someone else in their journey? One thing that helped when I went to my first meeting with the support group was knowing I was not alone. Obviously I knew other people had experienced the loss of a child but actually talking to someone that had been there and made it out the other side….not having to explain to people what you were feeling because they had felt the same things….venting about the things people would say that they thought helped but really just made it worse….priceless.
And that is what I hope this blog will be. A way to share my experiences, my journey, and maybe help someone along the way….